the bar is walked into by the passive voice...
[tw: cissexism]

mom asked me if i was trans* again last week (said no)

she reminded me of when i was a toddler and had my “NO I’M A BOY” phase

as we’re watching this documentary on a trans guy

and so, like, proudly, says that “and [she] say [me] down and said ‘no, honey, you’re a girl, you have girl parts like mommy!’”

…w h y

why the fuck would i ever come out to you

ever

oh and apparently i’ve started thinking of myself with ze/hir pronouns

which is weird

because usually when i use ze i totally bastardise the pronoun set because i hate hir because i have an “internet accent”/reading accent/what have you when i’m reading it

so i read it as a more feminine her

wot

and here is the lovely blogowner after ze cries into hir pillow (blanket whatever) about relationships that can’twon’t happen
awesome
okay it’s a few hours post-breakdown but i’m still on the edge ugh
and usually i love reading about other people’s kinks
seeing why they kink on what and how it works even if it’s not my thing
but
not tonight
ugh

and here is the lovely blogowner after ze cries into hir pillow (blanket whatever) about relationships that can’twon’t happen

awesome

okay it’s a few hours post-breakdown but i’m still on the edge ugh

and usually i love reading about other people’s kinks

seeing why they kink on what and how it works even if it’s not my thing

but

not tonight

ugh

My mom keeps telling me I look like a boy.

And how much she hates it.

Dude, I have longish hair if a gender-neutral cut, DD’s I’m not binding, and feminine glasses.

The fuck else do you want?

Also, she’s the only person who thinks this, so it doesn’t matter anyway.

Had a paperthing that was for some survey. It used the acronym “LGBTQ” o it, and a couple guys in my class were reading it. They asked what the Q meant, and aren’t people just L, G, B, or T?

C and I just looked at each other and started naming ALL THE SEXUALITIES AND GENDER IDENTITIES.

So when I was little, maybe a couple years old, I told my mom I was a boy.

Any time she called me a girl.

I don’t remember this, but apparently I did it for a while.

She never did anything, just told me firmly that no, I was a girl.

I’ve wondered for a while if maybe I knew I wasn’t when I was younger and just… lost touch with the feeling or something. 

Dunno, it seems like if you tell anyone they’re one gender for long enough they’d believe it.

Just ordered some clippers.

Undercut coming soon to a ginger near you!

(…Well, not near you. I live in unNarnia. Whatever.)

And then this summer I shall cut the rest of it shortish and dye it blue.

Oh man.

Every time I see something saying “You only say you’re <genderfluid/genderqueer/pansexual/anything that doesn’t go along with the gender binary> because you heard about it on tumblr.”

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Walked to the store wearing my binder, loose shirt, and the loosest jeans I have today. Felt great, except for the 70-degree weather and mile-long walk one way.

2) How did you grow up with your gender? (tl;dr: boobs)

Kind of neutrally, I guess?

Here’s the thing: I don’t remember most of my life outside the past three years. It was shitty between ages 9 and 12, and before that I don’t think I gave a fuck. It was alright.

Though I have to say - I’ve always been friends with guys, and I’ve always been so thrilled about being “one of the guys.” Sometimes, I don’t want to be seen as a girl with guy friends, because sometimes I am one of the guys.

On the flipside, once puberty hit, people started noticing me. I like the attention. Fuck, I love it. I want men to look at me, as a girl, and I want them to look at me. I want them to want me. This is when I love my tits - they’re big and attract attention.

When I’m a guy, my tits suck.

…I’m going to be posting about my boobs a lot okay they are my favourite and least-favourite feature.

BASICALLY it’s good unless I’m feeling masculine, then I just kind of deflate when somebody points out that I’m a “girl.”